it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THEY SELL PREFROZEN MARGARITAS AND THEY COME WTH A STRAW. MY PRIORITIES ARE IN ORDER
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
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