her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Seriously I'm not after your cock. It's a nice bonus, like finding $20 in the dryer, but not the reason I hang out with you.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
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