You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I'm watching Pretty Woman alone and weaving a basket for Fiona. This is my life.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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