with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
They sat me on college avenue with a puke bucket and people were mistakenly throwing change in it. Got me enough money take a cab back to my apartment.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
Randomize
