i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Were you seriously humming twinkle twinkle little star while cupping my balls?
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
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