i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
We convinced her the game "just the tip" was a billiards game. She was asking a couple guys if they wanted to play as we left. I kinda don't want to ask her how the rest of the night went.
So instead of getting the if-you-hurt-my-little-girl-youre-dead talk, i got the alcohol-is-our-friend talk, i like her dad already
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
I just want to find somebody intelligent enough to trick my parents into thinking she's not a trophy wife. Is that too much to ask?
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