Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize