there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I just threw up blood. Also i just remembered i got hit in the face with a 2 by 4.
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
Randomize
