A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I think the saddest part about my sex life is that most of it is pity sex.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
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