is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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