Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
So, I'm about to take my pants off in the Walmart parking lot, when am old lady parks next to me. I'm all the way in the back next to the semis. What the hell?
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize
