dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
