dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
laying in bed listening to christian music, jealous of the hope they have for their life. also need to beat off, can i think about you?
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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