didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
I'm sorry I make you whore yourself out to him everytime I'm drunk and want mcdonalds.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize