She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
Yo if you blacked out last night, careful going through your purse. There's cocaine in a lollipop wrapper.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
