I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
You know the sex was rough when you wake up with a chipped tooth. I have no regrets
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Randomize
