Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
Randomize
