ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Her boyfriend offered to buy me a vibrator. I'm not sure how to feel about that.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize