If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
she told me to hold the wheel while she hung out the sunroof and cursed the old lady behind us out.
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I feel like he has a double life, why was he walking around at 3 am with a backpack?
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I went eBay shopping last night. Turns out I brought a Viking drinking horn. I can't even be mad.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
I'm really sorry I called you a "smug, arrogant, boyfriend-fucking piece of defecation". I was super drunk.
I was going to be mad, but then I remembered you don't use autocorrect and spelled everything correctly and I was kinda impressed.
Randomize
