i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
