We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
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The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Played never have I ever with high schoolers today. Needless to say they brought up threesomes so I had to make a judgement call and decided to not put my finger down
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Seeing my ex post concert Snapchat videos as an Instagram really reinforces that I made the right choice...
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
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