I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I am in a vortex of obligation.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize