i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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