I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
the maid of honor just got in a fight with the mother of the bride at a gas station across the street. best. wedding. ever.
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
Found the puke drawer
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
that is very illegal...i love you.
Randomize
