Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
