Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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