but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
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