i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
He just told me he's been drinking vodka at work all day. I'm starting to believe in soul mates.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
I don't even know if he's actually hot or just hot because he plays hockey..
You did not just say that.
Randomize
