Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
In the airport and just saw a little boy put his head in his mother's crotch... I guess he took a whiff because he backed up and said loudly, "mommy your pee-pee is stinky!"
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
your girlfriend showed us your homemade porn last night.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize