Kiss
Puke
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
It just gets louder and louder too...dear god. Her poor vagina.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
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