the level of his annoyance + every insult he makes = the closer I am to telling him im fucking his ex
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
Randomize
