.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
Randomize
