No idea how I passed that sobriety test.
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
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