That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Good news my life of crime finally paid off
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