I just crawled out of a second story window using a sheet and his clothes for a rope so he wouldn't wake up.
I am so glad I watched Macgyver as a kid.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Boobs are out for the taking
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
