OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.