This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
It's the 3rd day of the year and I've already sucked two dicks. New year same ole me.
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize
