DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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