Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
I bought a machete, tennis balls, and matches. How is this NOT going to be a great night?
Randomize
