But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
theres a note on the fridge that says "guess what i peed in" and a half-full bottle of apple juice front and center. why did you let him in the house?
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.