He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
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