If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
Randomize
