the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Good to know: if a hot girls asks to go back to my place, she probably just needs to vomit all over my bathroom
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Randomize
