doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
