Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I don't know where you went, but if you're anywhere near the liquor, pour me another drink
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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