i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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