scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
