i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
