We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
And suddenly....Tubas. Tubas everywhere.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
