if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
My cat gives me a boner
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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